Issue 35, Final Fringe

I Will Miss You When You Are Gone

by Jacob Driscoll Issue 24 11.15.2010


My friend the virgin once told me that some hidden love still existed, deep beneath the sea. We were standing in the Atlantic, and she pointed out, and down.

“Out there is a world with talking squids and fish that play rock and roll, and boys that tell the truth and say ‘I love you, too.’”

I pointed at her. Right at her forehead.

“I think that world is in there.”

“You’re a cynic, you know that? If you go under water, and swim for long enough, you can find a world where true love dwells. It’s indisputable.”

“Okay, sure. You’ve convinced me. I’ll follow you. Lead the way.”

She shook her head. “I can’t. I can’t hold my breath long enough. I would drown waiting to get there. It’s the waiting that kills me.”

“The waiting kills all of us, sooner or later.”

“I can’t wait any longer. Why am I so impatient?” Her fists are balls of self-loathing fury.

“Because everything makes sense only in the aftermath. When we die, we can stop looking forward, we can look back and see where we’ve come from. Because then everything stops, and we can just breathe.”

“Except…we’ll have no breath.”

“It’s a metaphor, kiddo.”

“Oh.” The waves lap at our ankles, and the gulls cry. The sea air stinks of fish and salt.

“That perfect world beneath the waves isn’t a metaphor, you know.” She looks at me with bludgeoning brown eyes, deep pools that radiate darkness into whatever stares into them. “It’s really out there.”

I touch her head. “Better out there than in here.”

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Jacob Driscoll

Jacob Driscoll

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Jacob Driscoll believes that you are a good person. He wants you to know you are not alone. He is cheering for you. Jacob lives and writes in Brooklyn. He has written interactive fiction for EN Publishing, including The Indomitable Fire Forest of Inennotdar and the upcoming The Dying Skyseer. He knows you can pull through this.